Pool PartyTom was giddy. Here was his chance to prove himself capable to his friends! As a new homeowner, he had not only a place to host parties, but also an above ground pool and deck. Rather than be late to everything, he could take credit for organizing everything. His best friends, Jack and Stephen, were somewhat skeptical.
This story is hilarious. Everyone seems to be like those annoying character in horror movies, the ones you can't wait to see get killed off (except for Stephen). The only comment I have is that saying the bucket is Curse of the Werewolf instead of chlorine makes the rest of the story seem somewhat anticlimactic. You might want ti save that 'til the end, or leave it as an anomaly for the readers to figure out for themselves. Also, what is with the amount of time he spends putting on sunscreen? Is he really pale or something? Overall, it was a very enjoyable story with a nice amount of sentence variation.
Hello again, and thank you! I'm happy you make an exception for Stephen; I think he'd appreciate not getting killed off.
Somewhat anticlimactic? That's actually the point. It's ridiculous for the bucket to say that, but I didn't want to insult readers' intelligence and imply the transformation was supposed to be a surprise after that. I figured I'd just go ahead and announce it, since transformation stories tend to be too predictable.
If the bucket is poking fun at the genre, the sunscreen is poking fun at me. I tend to go overboard with it at the beach, but I'm also the only member of my family who doesn't come back with sunburn. Unlike me, though, Tom has some social anxiety, and I think he's more comfortable getting ready for company than being among company. Thanks to Jack and Stephen, he loosens up by the end, at least temporarily.
Really happy you think it's hilarious.